Have you have ever wondered what positive parenting is and why it is important? Here we answer your question.
Often it can be helpful to understand the reason behind doing something. It gives us more incentive to do it.
Positive parenting is about :
1 Focusing on the positive points of the behaviour of children.
2. The view is that children aren't bad. More importantly it is some of the
behaviours that are bad/we don't want.
3. We are adjusting their behaviour positively.
Lets look at each of these in more detail
Focusing on the positive points of the behaviour of children.
This is important because often we put our attention onto negative aspects. Then we build up a view that there are multiple negative aspects. This affects the big picture of how we see that child. Then we start to view the child negatively. When we focus on the positive aspects we change the balance.
The children aren't bad, just their behaviours.
We focus on the fact that there is nothing bad about the child, just that some behaviours are undesirable in our eyes. This is important. And it is important because we want the children to feel good about themselves. Positive parenting does not attack the character of the children. It merely looks at their actions.
The result is that we are not implying that they are a bad child. We are just implying that their behaviour isn't what we are after.
We are positively adjusting behaviour
Once we have isolated the behaviour, we can then adjust it so that its fits with what we are after. This of course is subjective and sometimes it is our own views and habits that require reviewing. Regardless, Positive Parenting is about the way in which we adjust this behaviour.
The results of Positive Parenting
For the child
Firstly it makes the child happy because they are being praised and now behaving. Our own attitude about the child affects the child's view of themselves. We acknowledge that the behaviour is at fault, consequently the child does not think badly of themselves. Whilst adjusting their behaviour we are also aiming to build up their self esteem, confidence, resilience etc . All of these are crucial in their lives. They are not only essential for the here and now but also to be continually developed for their future life. The overall result when they feel better about themselves is they will make friends more easily and also do better at school. It also means they are less likely to have behavioural and emotional problems when they are older. Our role is to guide children and prepare them for their future. Life will throw challenges at them and we need them to be equipped to handle them.
For the parent
We don't want you to find parenting hard and stressful. Our role as a parent is to love, support and nurture our children. This is more likely when its easier and enjoyable. Positive Parenting facilities this. Happy parents means happy children.
We aren't just after getting children to do what the adults want. We are building a relationship with them. We are maintaining the bond between adult and child - whether it be the parent, caregiver or school teacher and so on. This also promotes cooperation between the two parties. In short, we do this through good communication and by being encouraging. When parents are continually on the back foot and telling their child off the environment becomes negative. The parents feel out of control. Positive Parenting means parents are happier about their parenting and their role as a parent when they feel more confident. When the parents are happier the children are happier.
The knock on effect is that when the parents aren't having to place their focus on parenting they can consider themselves more. Parent often neglect themselves because they are so stressed. Parenting is one of their major stressors in life. We relieve this pressure.
For the family
Better relationship means a more pleasant environment. Everyone is happier. People thrive in a positive environment. So everyone in the family has the potential to thrive.
In summary Positive Parenting leads to happier families. The parent is happier, the child grows up in a positive healthy environment and feels good about themselves.
The sooner you start to be a positive parent the better. We are here to help you with this. Take the first small steps today. It gets easier the more you practice it. Contact Positive Parenting Tips and Strategies - we make it easy for you. Free Initial consultation!